Channel Chumps: Putin's Pirates Point Potshots at Pleasure Boating Pensioners

AP Photo/Matt Dunham, file

There is an awfully hinky game of chicken being played in the English Channel right now, and it appears that Putin has found the perfect patsy to take out some of his frustrations on - the toothless tiger that is Great Britain's military. More specifically, the floating detritus in the water that remains of her once great naval tradition.

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Two days ago (John posted about the action here), Keir Starmer, a lost soul always in search of the one big news item to make him relevant again, announced that Royal Marines had boarded and taken a Russian dark fleet tanker running through the English Channel.

To be fair, the questions started almost immediately. Why this tanker and why now, when over 200 such dark fleet movers of sanctioned Russian oil had already, according to reports, been allowed to slip through the Channel under the watchful - or sleepy - eyes of the British government, despite their tough rhetoric to the contrary?

Was it, perhaps, that Starmer was now at the G-7 and desperately needed an image boost of his own on the world stage?

In March, Starmer had finally given the 'okay' for the British Navy to intercept these tankers. In those few months since, there have been some 150 tankers and 200 transits without anything stirring from the UK shore to interrupt their passages.

Saturday night, at last, British Marines boarded a tanker, the SMYRTOS, and Starmer boasted of the win.

TAKE THAT, VLAD

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But at home?

Whatever Starmer thought he'd accomplished, the resulting guffaws at home and slapback from Russia itself seem to have bought him little.

The video of the seizure itself gave rise to conspiracy theorists wondering how the cameraman came to be first down the ladderwell in a hostile situation in order to capture all the action. The sanitized interior of the vessel looked like a movie set.

Very strange.

And a six-hour-long operation?

As one commenter said, Somali pirates would have had that thing stopped, the crew stripped, and the vessel underway in under ten minutes. 

Too weird.

What happened next proves just how fangless the tiger is behind the mewling from shore. David covered the first reports of the incident yesterday.

The Russian frigate Admiral Grigorovich has been stationed in the English Channel, shadowing the British coast, for months. The Russians resupply the vessel in situ so that it can maintain its station, running up and down the Channel to escort these dark fleet tankers. As British defense analyst Michael Clark said, its presence is in order to 'frighten off the British and rightfully so.'

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And it had been a deterrent until Saturday night, when Starmer had his forces board the SMYRTOS.

Yesterday, in the Channel, 20 miles off the British coast near the Isle of Wight, the  Admiral Grigorovich fired what were consequently described as 'warning shots' at a yacht making its way across the water to Cherbourg, France.

Hard to believe the two incidents are not directly connected. Russia is peeved and pissy.

...The incident came days after Sir Keir Starmer ordered the Royal Marines to seize Smyrtos, a Russian shadow tanker carrying sanctioned oil, in the Channel 

The Russians were quick with their side of the story - 'Foolski boaters ignore us, lucky we shoot over their heads instead of send to briny deepski.'

"Today, June 16 at 12:45, the crew of the frigate Admiral Grigorovich in the English Channel discovered the civilian sailing yacht Bright Future, flying the British flag, which was following a dangerous course under engines to approach the ship.

"In accordance with the International Regulations for Preventing Collisions at Sea, the frigate's crew made several attempts to contact the civilian vessel on the international radio channel. There was no change in the yacht's course or response to the international radio channel requests.

"To attract the attention of the yacht's crew, flares were fired and sound signals were sounded. Despite these measures, the vessel continued its dangerous approach.

"After closing the distance to 150 meters, the frigate's commander decided to fire pre-emptively at the vessel's course with small arms. The British-flagged yacht then immediately changed course and continued moving away from the Russian warship.

"The crew of the frigate Admiral Grigorovich acted in strict accordance with international shipping regulations and took all necessary measures to prevent the incident"

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According to the Russians, the full panoply of 'Avast ye, there' was deployed repeatedly - flares, radio, etc., forcing them to pop shot until the yacht changed course.

And Starmer, now that he has his solitary tanker and moment of seafaring military glory, wants nothing more to do with poking the Russian Bear.

So he's being as magnanimous as possible about the situation the retirees faced on the water yesterday.

ALL A RECKLESS BUT NOT SINISTER MISUNDERSTANDING

Makes for a nice, tidy package, doesn't it?

But it turns out it's not.

For one thing, the rules of passage on the sea apply if anyone is familiar with them. Vessels under sail have right-of-way. Always. That was the first thing that popped out at me when I heard it was a sailboat involved.

 Unless anchored or disabled, and it wasn't, the Admiral Grigorovich was obliged to move out of the yacht's way.

But now it turns out that there's been some more of that public relations 'nudging' from the British government, similar to what's been alleged as tempering victims' family statements.

The couple on the yacht have spoken out, and they're pissed off.

For one thing, they assert most definitively that the Russians are lying.

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 And they'd like to know how British citizens minding their own business turned out to be the bad guys in this story.

A retired British couple who were subjected to Russian warning shots in the Channel have accused the Ministry of Defence of “trying to shut the story down”.

Jane and Alan Kelvey, 69 and 71, said the authorities wanted to downplay the incident for fear it was inflammatory.

The couple reported on Tuesday morning that the Admiral Grigorovich, a 409ft Russian frigate, had fired warning shots at about 11.40 as they sailed Bright Future, their 40ft British-flagged yacht.

British military sources played down the encounter as a “nautical incident” outside UK territorial waters in foggy conditions, rather than escalatory behaviour by Russia, suggesting that the fault lay with the pleasure boat.

But, speaking to The Telegraph on Wednesday, Mr Kelvey denied that he and his wife had done anything wrong. He said: “They’re trying to close the story down now, saying that it was foggy and they were shooting flares up. It’s rubbish.”

Asked why they were being apparently blamed, Mr Kelvey said: “It’s inflammatory, isn’t it?”

There was no fog, no flares, and no radio calls from the Admiral Grigorovich.

...Mr Kelvey insisted: “We didn’t see any flares at all. They normally go bang and you see them. It wasn’t a problem of fog. [We could] see him clearly. He could see us clearly.”

But, said Mr Kelvey after a night Cherbourg: “We distinctly heard the gunshot fire. That acts as a great deterrent.”

He added: “The MoD are saying they got us on the radio. Our radio, we were right next to it. It didn’t come on our radio.”

...But recounting the incident, Mr Kelvey said: “We were sailing happily along and we came across a warship just sort of standing in the middle of the Channel doing pretty well nothing.”

Mr Kelvey added: “We didn’t know what sort of warship it was at the time.” Referring to the automatic identification systems (AIS) that ships use to broadcast and receive information, he added: “No flags or anything, no AIS.”

Mr Kelvey said conditions were clear and the couple had their sails up. He said: “We were just on our course, we mind our own business. [The Grigorovich] was obviously aware of exactly who we were.”

Asked whether there had been a danger of collision, he said: “Absolutely not. I saw him for miles. I was just standing on my course.

And as I’m a sailing boat on a course under sail, I’ve got right of way. He wasn’t displaying anything to indicate that he was in trouble.”

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Right of way, rights of Englishmen...who needs rights?

Or who has them in Starmer's UK?

I feel another black eye is on the way, and I applaud these two for speaking up.

I really hope it doesn't go too badly for them.

Editor’s Note: Thanks to President Trump and his administration’s bold leadership, we are respected on the world stage, and our enemies are being put on notice.

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Ed Morrissey 10:00 PM | June 16, 2026
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