Now that summer is almost over, and the French can retire from killing old people in the heat and preening about how morally superior they are for letting Granny roast to death, as the state of their nation is so fantastic, they have to actually go on the hunt for something to fuss with. There's simply nothing obvious that needs their attention.
What they've decided is that they'll resurrect a long-slumbering war on English commonly used in France - Franglais, as it's known.
You'll easily recognize some of the vile, unsophisticated catchphrases that have so offended the purists. English words that cause ears to bleed, like 'Black Friday,' 'must have,' and (I did not know this was popular in France, but okay) the exceedingly good suggestion to 'try before you buy.'
Holy smokes. Now I'm offended.
Now, the French tried this a while ago, in an effort to save their romance language and trying to claw the country back to the purity of all French all the time.
France has restarted its long-running war on the English language with plans to ban the use of “Black Friday” and anglicised government slogans.
The country’s own culture ministry has cited the spread of “Black Friday” promotions in English as evidence that the 1994 Toubon law protecting the French language is ill-adapted to the internet age.
The innerwebs have ruined everything, non?
One government minister suggested that people not go to Black Friday sales at all. Repairing and recycling your clothing was much more in keeping with the French aesthetic. No one needed new threads.
Oh, didn't Minister Goody-Two-Shoes get blasted by furious French shopkeepers who were probably already angry after having lost a grandmother to that sort of thinking during the heatwave.
France warns people off Black Friday clothes deals
The French government has launched a campaign encouraging people not to buy new clothes in Black Friday sales.
The advert shows a man asking for advice in a shop before an assistant tells him not to buy anything, to help the planet and his finances.
The minister for ecological transition - responsible for promoting sustainability - Christophe Béchu, is behind the campaign.
But the message has been criticised by other government departments.
Finance minister Bruno Le Maire called it "ill-conceived" and said it would harm "honest businesses".
Le Maire's department been trying to tackle the rise in unemployment and the cost of living crisis - and seasonal sales are thought to put more money back into the economy.
Black Friday, when retailers offer significant discounts and promotions, is one of the biggest shopping days of the year in many European countries.
On Thursday Béchu admitted that the message may have targeted the wrong businesses, he told France Inter: "We should have targeted online sales platforms rather than physical businesses with the same message."
Minister for Ecological Transition Béchu grudgingly said maybe he should have limited the scope of the message to online shopping. But you could tell his heart wasn't in the apology when he refused to take the government anti-Black Friday ad campaign down, despite all the blowback.
Sore loser.
And now the government is going after the words 'Black Friday' themselves. At least they're going to try to do it online, where they have their fingers in everyone's business already anyway.
France’s latest national crisis isn’t the deficit, the gangs, or the fact that half the country already speaks English at work.
— Keith Ainsworth (@AinsworthKeith) August 27, 2026
It’s the phrase “Black Friday.”
A new bill would ban untranslated English in online ads. pic.twitter.com/mwqwOxIPKd
Every online ad in French and lots of other no-nos to come, following the Québécois rulebook. Which is hilarious.
Canadians are more French than the French.
...Under the plans, multi-national companies could no longer address employees in France solely in English, while the proliferation of university courses taught entirely in English would be curbed.
Even state-backed slogans such as “Choose France” and “French Tech”, which are dear to Emmanuel Macron, the French president, could be targets of the proposed clampdown, Mr Chantrel’s office told The Telegraph.
...Mr Chantrel wants the French translation of foreign wording in online advertising to have “equal legibility”.
His office confirmed that would mean the same-size lettering, preventing advertisers from displaying an English slogan prominently while reducing its French equivalent to tiny print.
Public services and local authorities would face stricter obligations, while the government’s official guardian of the French language, DGLFLF, would gain stronger powers to investigate and sanction breaches, inspired by Quebec’s powerful language watchdog. The precise sanctions have yet to be set out.
The purists are having a renaissance and hoping to revisit past successes, as there seems to be a resurgence of alarm in certain French circles over 'globish.'
...In 2022, the Académie Française, official guardians of the French language, threatened legal action over English words such as “surname” appearing on France’s new identity cards.
...Language purists complained that the name Lorraine Airport infringed language laws with its use of English and was an insulting example of “Anglo-mania”. It was told to change its name to Lorraine Aéroport.
Timed to coincide with Paris Fashion Week, purists also hoped to oust terms such as “must-have”, “lifestyle” and “try before you buy”.
They are geared up and ready for a fight and have at it, lads.
Especially as there's never anything better to do.
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